ShareThis
7) Lord Crump & The X-Nauts
First Appearance: Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door (GameCube, 2004)
The X-Nauts and their portly leader Lord Crump are a tour de force of blustering hilarity. The group makes one heck of a first impression, launching into a discombobulated dog pile in an attempt to nab Mario that leaves them fighting amongst themselves while the plumber quietly slips away. Coupled with the X-Nauts and Crump’s signature goofy x-salute (where their arms are stiffly crossed in front of their chests as a greeting), it was clear from the beginning that there was something delectably off-kilter about this misfit group of baddies. While the X-Naut grunts are funny, Lord Crump is the show stealer with his outlandish plans to foil Mario. The best scheme has to be his pirate-themed Four-Eyes disguise, which is painfully obvious to everyone but Mario (and made funnier when Crump does a fourth wall break and tells the player not to let Mario in on his deception). The ineptitude Lord Crump and the X-Nauts put on display is among the best in any Mario RPG.
I was about to complain that Geno wasn’t number one, and then I saw Fawful and realized that, yes, Geno is not as awesome as Fawful. He had Fury! And as he would like to remind you:
“But…the day comes soon when Fawful rises again, and then no baby’s candy has safety! I am counting chickens before they are even eggs, before the chickens are even chickens!
I miss Jr. Troopa. He had a very brief cameo in TTYD, though. I miss Paper Mario in general. Like… REAL Paper Mario type stuff. I was a big fan of Super Paper Mario, and was glad to see the change in gameplay. I expected Sticker Star to be like the first two games, but it really wasn’t. Not to say that Sticker Star wasn’t a great game in its own right, but I want another Paper Mario with a long story, crazy partners and action commands, and a seamless world.