As much as we love video games, even we have to admit that they can be a bit touchy sometimes. It’s hard to enjoy talking about the intricacies of Star Fox 64 at, say, a sports bar, and even when your friends are nerdy enough to play beer pong with beakers instead of red cups, you’d be hard-pressed to discuss the parallel timelines of the Zelda universe. And let’s not get started on that perennial argument of whether video games are art. We don’t want anyone to get hurt.
But sometimes, pain is necessary. You’ve got to just rip off that virtual Band-Aid. That’s why this week, we’re tackling some major issues that would drive lesser websites to Dionysian alcoholism. Issues like whether F-Zero deserves a place in the modern world, or what drives Mario Kart players to use Blue Shells on their own friends. We’ll talk about the glories of fighting off villains with a partner (bromance ahoy!) and– this is our cue to hold our heads high– valiantly defend that greatest of platforming shames, Bubsy the Bobcat.
You still with us? Great. Because after E3 2011, we’ve got to strike back with a show of our own. You know us– we’d never miss that kind of opportunity.
Send your best Shigeru Miyamoto impression to email@example.com.
Issue 54: Pass the Bottle
F-Zero: Race Towards the Future
A truly next-gen version of F-Zero at 60 fps, 3000 mph? Yes, please.
Confessions of a Justified Player by Adam Sorice
Forgive me, Miyamoto, for I have sinned.
Dojo-Show-Go! Episode 147 by M. Noah Ward
Noah, Aaron, and Tidman do the same thing they do every week: try to take over the world.
Nester64x: Oedipus Prime by Nester64x
That Baby Metroid really likes Samus Aran, doesn’t it?
Shells: The Ultimate Toolkit Against Evil by Lewis Hampson
Why does Mario like using those Koopa remains so much?
In Defense of Bubsy by Andrew Hsieh
No, seriously, he’s got some redeeming qualities. I … I think.
Is Something Going On? by Mel Turnquist
Mel brings the glory days of the fanfic age– OTPs and all– to Nintendojo.
Cerebral Gamer: Courting Disaster
What began simply as a PAL region test-drive turned out to be something quite unexpected in Disaster: Day of Crisis.
Additional features in this issue…
- Now Playing by Kevin Knezevic
- Industry Chatter by James Stank
- Week: End Game: On by Smith Stuart
- Weekly News Roundup by Aaron Roberts
Coming Up Next Week…
Issue 55: Smells Like Team Spirit
A week dedicated to NES Play Action Football! (Just kidding. We’re all about retro, though.)