
 |


 |


 |
| GENRE |
| Action |
| DEVELOPER |
| Pacific Coast Power & Light Co. |
| PUBLISHER |
| THQ |
| NUMBER OF PLAYERS |
| 1 |
| CONNECTIVITY |
| no |
BUY NOW AT

|
Power Rangers: Dino Thunder
Power Rangers: Dino Thunder may, in fact, be the greatest invention throughout the history of mankind. In fact, I wouldn't doubt that the meaning of life isn't buried deep within its beautiful candy shell. If I had to describe Power Rangers: Dino Thunder in two words, I would say... Mmmm... Delicious. After playing through this game, I must sit and reflect on where my life has been going. Where have I strayed? Why have I renounced my faith? Then I thought to myself... perhaps Power Rangers: Dino Thunder is where I was always meant to regale in great jubilation. I began comparing the game to The Legend of Zelda, Final Fantasy VI, Super Mario 64, and, of course, the Holy Bible. It was under this pretense that many of my friends began to question my isolation. So deep was the experience that I had lost all contact with the human race. I had drifted off to a higher plane of existence in pure ethereal form. Then I discovered the truth. Power Rangers: Dino Thunder is quite possibly the best video game ever created by mindless, starving, or otherwise tormented zombie monkies.
visuals
Following up such a powerful introduction with the visual aspect of Power Rangers: Dino Thunder is like following up a five-minute Listerine gargle with a nice, tall glass of orange juice and a king-sized almond Snickers. In fact, that's exactly what watching this game is all about. Pain and grossness. Moreso the latter than the former. Sure, there's a bright candy coating around everything. Once you realize that you're trapped in a machine that is about as animated as a ten-day-old bass at your local supermarket, you'll begin wondering what, exactly, went wrong. To say that the game looks anything like the television show is a joke in and of itself. If you've ever imagined living in Reef City, just imagine a bunch of suburbian skyscrapers surrounded by invisible walls. One could say that you'd be living in The Truman Show. One could also punch you in the face and call it fun.
audio
While I was playing this game, my fellow dojoite Morgan Stephenson managed to chew his own ears off. Which is weird, considering that that isn't even possible. The sound effects, all four or five of them, are entertaining enough to keep the game going. The music is filled with guitar riffs and other bad-to-the-bone Power Rangers themes. When it comes down to the voice acting, I'm immediately reminded of season four of Big Brother. Why? Dear God, why? There must be a rational explaination somewhere in the cosmos.
gameplay
Remember the good old days when one would control up to six power rangers instead of a measily three? It's a little weird having only three power rangers. However, greatness must start with simplicity. Or so crazy people say. You'll start out in the tar-pits, fighting as the red Tyrano-zord in order to save the yellow Ptera-zord. Once you've made it to the next level, you'll be able to save the blue Tricera-zord. Afterwards, the player can switch between each zord on the fly. Each character has their own perks. Red can shoot projectiles, Yellow can fly, and Blue can kill anything in its path for the most part. The Black Ranger's Brachio-zord makes an appearance here and there, but other than that, it's the same thing over and over again. That same thing is a really, really boring thing. Not much else can be said about the play mechanics. Fifty mission and nine different areas later, it's time for lunch.
multiplayer
Single-player only. You know, because there's only one power ranger. Oh, wait. There's more than one. Well, at least they don't rely too heavily on teamwork to accomplish their goals. Oh, wait. They do.
overall
In summary, Power Rangers: Dino Thunder is below average. In fact, it's a little bit below mediocre. Now, while I've gone through several hundred tirades in the amount of time it took me to write this review, I have to say one final thing. If you're a big fan of the Power Rangers and you've been hearing that the game isn't that great, you have little reason not to not to get this game. I, myself, have bought horrible games based off of their respective licenses. Just because Dino Thunder is one of the reasons I cry myself to sleep every night. It's nothing to be proud of, but it isn't shameful either. However, consider your choice carefully. Twenty dollars can buy a lot these days. Like a sense of respect. Check eBay.

|

 |



 |
Austin Starr
Staff Profile | Email
"If life's not beautiful without the pain / well I'd just rather never ever even see beauty again" |





|